My day began with an electricity outage on my side of the street and a couple of blocks behind me. Great! That means no shower and blown dry hair. All I had to work with were the three candles you see above. I like the fact that my house doesn't have a bunch of big windows, until I need them. Asa complained the whole time, but I reminded him that he didn't have to worry about his hair as much, didn't have to deal with makeup, etc. Figured I'd better get the garage door open only to discover that the emergency release latch had a very short string, and it was right above the car. Climbed up and pulled. The string came off. Tried moving it and it was solidly stuck. Climb back down. Got the WD-40, and climbed back up. Finally got it moved, opened the door. Remembered that I had done laundry last night and the clothes were in the dryer. Sadly, the electricity must have gone out before they dried. Had to make it a "jean day" even if it wasn't supposed to be one. Got dressed, attempted to heat up my sausage biscuit in the microwave and then couldn't figure out why it wasn't working. Got to school late. Put on my make up on during 1st period, felt gross all day and just a yuck attitude.
As the day wore on, I just resigned myself to it all, and then word came that there had been a bomb threat at the Walgreen's down the street from our school. Really, a Walgreen's?? There was also a rumor that the Wells Fargo bank next door to the Walgreen's had been robbed, but not sure about that one. Of course, that's my bank.
Yesterday wasn't a whole lot better, just anxious and frustrating things going on.
So by the time I got home this afternoon, I had about an hour before I had to go to my Marian Consecration class at church. Had to finish my homework, and so glad I did. This week we've been studying Mother Teresa and her connection to Mary. I've always admired Mother Teresa. She was one of the most steadfast of the faithful and didn't waiver in her dedication to the poor and the children of India. Her story is fascinating. I wasn't aware of her mystical visions which lead her to begin her work in India. In her first vision, she described a huge crowd of all kinds of people that included the very poor and children. The people in the crowd were raising their hands toward her and calling out, "Come, come, save us -- bring us to Jesus." The second vision was the same crowd, but this time she could see suffering and sorrow in their faces. She was kneeling toward Mary, who was facing the crowd. She couldn't see Mary's face, but could hear her as she said, "Take care of them -- they are mine. Bring them to Jesus -- carry Jesus to them. -- Fear not." Isn't that beautiful? Take care of them, they are mine. In the third vision, the same crowd was there, but covered in darkness. Teresa could see them anyway, but she was a little child. She was just in front of Mary, and Mary's left hand was on Teresa's left shoulder while her right had held Teresa's right arm. They were facing the Cross and Jesus said to Teresa: "I have asked you. They have asked you, and she, My Mother, has asked you. Will you refuse to do this for Me -- to take care of them, to bring them to me?" Wow! I believe I'd get right on that, and of course, Teresa did. She spent the rest of her life doing just that. How was she able to maintain her faith and sanity throughout all the pain and suffering she saw these people endure? My life isn't even minutely on that level, yet I sometimes have difficulty with endurance.
This was all a reminder of focus and perspective. My life has been much more stable in the last six months, but I still find myself letting all the crap seep into my focus when I should be focusing on something else. The annoyances of every day life, of inconveniences like the electricity being out, etc. so easily win our focus. We let them bring us down and feel downhearted. Instead, we should be looking for the blessings present in each annoyance and each inconvenience. Sometimes it's hard to find them, but they are always there. Some days I'm better at finding them than I am on other days. At the end of the day, list off the things we're thankful for, not the things we wish had gone differently or that demanded our focus to create a bad mood and unnecessary fussing at others. Each day is a gift, and each day is full of gifts. When I remember that, I'm much more at peace. I remember the things I should be doing and giving. I so wish we could all be better at this exercise. What a difference it would make in eliminating the bitterness, disappointment, and hurt so many live their lives by.
As Mother Teresa explains:
"The greatest evil is the lack of love and charity, the terrible indifference towards one's neighbor . . . people today are hungry for love, for understanding love which is greater and which is the only answer to loneliness and great poverty."
My accepting the small joys, allows me to be open to all the graces I tend to run from out of fear of disappointment and hurt. When I was climbing on top of the car in the dark garage and struggling to open the release latch on the garage door, I wasn't thinking clearly. I was annoyed instead of being grateful that I hadn't overslept, that at least I had a nice garage to put my car in, and that I don't have to live without electricity and all these other comforts every day. I forgot to embrace the frustrations for what they really were.
